This Is Quite Interesting

We have phrases that look perfectly normal to us:

• The bandage was wound around the wound.
• The farm was used to produce produce.
• The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
• We must polish the Polish furniture.
• He could lead if he would get the lead out.
• The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
• Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
• A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
• When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
• I did not object to the object.
• The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
• There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
• They were too close to the door to close it.
• The buck does funny things when the does are present.
• A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
• To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
• The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
• After a number of injections my jaw got number.
• Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
• I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
• How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

In what other language:

• Do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
• Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
• Can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
• Can you have a nose that runs and feet that smell?

It just goes to prove that English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why:

• When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
• There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
• English muffins weren’t invented in England nor French fries in France.
• Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
• Your house can burn up as it burns down, you fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm goes off by going on.

Finally:

• Why is it that writers write, but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham?
• If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese, so one moose, two meese?
• If you have a load of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end?
• If teachers have taught, why haven’t preachers praught?
• Doesn’t it seem crazy, that you can make amends but not one amend?
• If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Adapted from a page I found HERE

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